The Bossy Bar-Wife


Location: United States

Friday, March 23, 2007

Nothing Worth Having Is Easy

Well, as you know, I bought the gazebo/canopy thing for our back slab on Monday night. I have today off, so my dad came over this morning to help me put it up. Easy as pie, right?

Since this probably isn't your first day reading my blog (but if it is, welcome!) , you know that nothing ever goes really smoothly the first time around for the Bossies. So, my dad comes over this morning, and we get it out to the backyard and start to assemble it.

The whole thing was going together pretty smoothly, until I realized one small problem:

Due to the height of the frame of the canopy, we can't open the back door.

Now, you may be wondering why I can't just move it back far enough so that the door can open, and that's a fair question. However, our backyard (tiny) drops off immediately at the end of the concrete and is a small hill to the privacy fence our backyard neighbors just put up. (I guess we were bugging them? Who knows. Maybe they don't like dead plants.)

So, instead of flying into a rage, I just looked to my dad for a solution. And of course, he had several. (One of them was taking the whole thing back, but I vetoed that idea). What we're actually going to do is make some concrete forms to raise it up a little bit so that the door can open.

Anyway, as usual, it is going to take a little longer than usual, but I am hopeful that soon I will be the proud owner of a backyard gazebo AND will be able to get to it. I'll be sure to keep you posted.

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

For the Love of Target

Let's see if this scenario sounds at all familiar to you. You decide to go to Target to pick up a couple of things that you need. An hour and hundreds of dollars later, you're standing at the counter wondering why you came for toothpaste and detergent and are leaving with three new shirts, two bags, some books, some totally cute plates, and some hair products.


Well, yesterday when I got home from work, Mr. Bossy says to me "Do you want to go to Target?" He barely had the sentence out of his mouth before I was like "Hell, yeah! Let's go!"

You may not know this, but Mr. Bossy is teaching himself Italian. He likes to study. So, he bought some software and some books, and is teaching himself to speak Italian. We don't have a trip to Italy planned, but someday we might, so he wants to be ready. Plus, he likes to learn about Italian wine. (I'm not sure you need to speak Italian to do this, but whatever. Someone in our household should enjoy studying and learning).

Anyway, he wanted a notebook and some "flashcards" so help him with his studies, so he wanted to go to Target. Now, I didn't need anything specific, except some laundry detergent, I was just along for the ride.

So, our first stop was of course... the One Spot. All Hail the One Spot. You remember, if you've been reading this scintillating blog for awhile, that I got a kitchen chalkboard for Christmas. I finally got it hung up to my liking, and am loving having it so far. So, you can imagine my delight when I approached the One Spot and saw CHALK SHAPED LIKE EASTER EGGS! Into the cart they went.

We managed to do pretty well, just getting what we came for, until we got to the Garden area. Now, we have a pretty small yard, and on the back of our house is a 10 x 10 concrete slab, basically, where we keep our grill and ... a dead plant. (I kill things). Anyway, our neighbors bought this fabulous canopy thing for their slab last year, and it totally makes their back yard look a million times better. So, we tried to get one last year, but they were out of stock or something.

But! When we got to the garden section, there they were, in all their glory. We asked the price on the one we wanted, and it was pretty reasonable! The guy said they even had it in stock. We must be living right!

Well, when the guy actually went into the warehouse, he couldn't find it, but he called another Target and found out that they had three of them. So, off we went. After a few false starts with the Target employees, ( one of them referred to both Mr. Bossy and me as "ladies"), we were the proud owners of this baby:

Bear in mind, that's not my backyard and we don't have that furniture. Remember: At press time we have a grill and a dead plant. But, my handyman dad is coming over sometime this weekend to help us put it up, and I am sure that I will get it furnished shortly thereafter. I am super-pumped about this.

Two hours, two Targets, Two hundred-some odd bucks all added up to one fabulous Monday at the Bossy house.

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Thank you, Soapnet

Attention please!

Soapnet has made an EXCELLENT programming decision:

Beginning Monday, April 9, THE OC will join their lineup! This means I can re-live the glory that was Season 1 (and totally skip season three, that piece of crap--except when Marissa died) all the time!!

When I first heard this news, I was a little nervous that The OC was going to take the place of its mother show, a certain BH 90... you know the rest. But! I checked the website and this is what they had to say:

"The O.C." and "One Tree Hill" will air Monday-Friday, beginning April 9. The O.C. will air at 6PM, One Tree Hill at 5PM. SOAPnet's number 1 acquired soap with women 18-34, Beverly Hills 90210, will lead into both new series at 3PM and 4PM.

So, I see I'm not the only 18-34 year old woman with a serious problem. Congrats to me.

Additionally, for those of you who watch Idol--- Melinda Doolittle-- LOVE HER. Thank you.

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Donna Martin Procreates!

So, Tori Spelling is in labor. I haven't seen yet that the baby was born, a boy that I can only HOPE is named David Silver McDermott. Or something like that.

You know a die-hard 90210-er like me couldn't let this slide. However, in the interest of full disclosure, I have NO LOVE for Tori OR Donna Martin. How could the creative genius that is Aaron Spelling have created that girl?

Donna was definitely my least favorite character on this show, even though I do own a "Donna Martin Graduates" t-shirt. However, when I watch that episode now, I am completely baffled by why the students thought they could fight the school board for the right to be drunk at prom.
I mean, what? And they won? If you haven't seen it (hard to fathom), Donna knew that anyone who was caught drunk at prom would be thrown out of school. So she got drunk, went to prom, got kicked out of school, FOUGHT THE SCHOOL BOARD IN A WALK-OUT OF FINALS PROTEST LED BY BRANDON WALSH , and got to graduate? That's not what would have happened at my school, how about you?

And come on...her hair? Horrible throughout the years, especially that sophomore year of college with the insanely platinum blond bob when she was getting thrown down the stairs by her "musician" boyfriend, Ray Pruit. And do NOT get me started on her ever-growing boobs. Seriously?

All right, I will step out of 1993 and join you now in the present, where Tori Spelling is still on my mind. Damn you, Donna Martin. You always win.

Monday, March 12, 2007

I TOLD you, I like Cookies!

I went out of town Thursday morning (early) and didn't get back until last night. Some of my stories wouldn't be particularly funny to you, as you don't know the people I was with, and you aren't a member of this particular group I was traveling with (or ARE you? That's the mystery of the blog world).

Anyway, Mr. Bossy wasn't with me on this trip, but I did call him every night to chat. One night , he said that he had gone out with some friends. He then said, "I was so hungry when I got home that I ate a couple of the Tagalongs that you had put in the freezer. I didn't eat too many though, because I know they are your favorite".

Now, let me take just a moment to clarify this. Tagalongs are probably my favorite cookie EVER. When I see the Girl Scout cookie form, I start dreaming of the moment that the Tags enter my life again. I put this box in the freezer specifically so I would have them at a later date, when I had exhausted my supply. I've already eaten the other box we got, and my supply from my niece in Ohio had not yet arrived (BTW-- GS Cookies in Ohio are cheaper than they are in my state. Very strange).

So, when he told me this, I said, "Well, that's good, I do really love them, so I am glad you only ate a few."

Lest you think I am a totally selfish barwife who won't share food with her husband, HIS favorite kind is Samoas and I ordered him plenty, and I rarely eat those. So, he has cookies to keep him occupied. Also, there was a community box of Thin Mints. So, just relax.

Cut to last night, after dinner. I go to the freezer to investigate the Tagalong situation, and open the box to find three left. Meaning that Mr. Bossy ate TWELVE of them. (Not that I couldn't do that, mind you, but that's beside the point here).

You can imagine that in my totally exhausted state, I didn't handle this well. "MR BOSSY!" I yelled (insert full name there). "WHAT?" he replied. I walk into the living room, waving the cookie box, yelling and screaming about the lack of Tagalongs and how twelve cookies is not the same as "a couple". I mean, seriously. I LIKE COOKIES. I THINK ABOUT THEM A LOT. Has he not read this blog?

Anyway, to his credit, he took full responsibility and said he'd get me some more. However, this morning, my cookies from Ohio arrived, so...crisis averted. At least for now.

Now, I don't want you to think I am some sort of raving lunatic who freaks out over cookies, but... apparently that's exactly what I am. Sheesh.

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

I Really Hate This Song

I know I've been a bad blogger lately, I have had a terrible time coming up with something to write about lately. But, I have been thinking about the following:

There is a commercial on right now, I think it might be for Wendy's, that has that song "Blister in the Sun" by the Violent Femmes.

I HATE THAT SONG. I hate it so much. I hope I don't start hating Wendy's as a result of how much I hate that song. That would be a tragedy.

This got me to thinking about a few other songs I really despise, so here they are, in no particular order:

1. "Photograph" by Nickelback. If you don't hate this song, you aren't paying attention to the lyrics:
Look at this photograph! Everytime I do it makes me laugh! How did our eyes get so red? And what the hell is on Joey's head?

Great start there, buddy. Riveting writing.

2. "3 AM" by Matchbox 20: "the clock on the wall's been stuck at three for days". Oh no.

3. "Ironic" by Alanis Morrissette. "10,000 spoons when all you need is a knife" ???? Oh no! I have 10,000 spoons! Crap! All I need is a knife!

4. "Don't Cha" (or however you spell it) by the Pussycat Dolls. I hate them and everything they produce. "Buttons"? Shut up.

I think there have to be more. I welcome your additions to this list.

Friday, March 02, 2007

An Intellectual Conversation

Scene: Me, sitting on the couch staring dreamily off into space. Mr. Bossy, sitting next to me, reading or something.

Mr. Bossy: What are you thinking about?

Me: (coming back to earth)...Do you really want to know?

Mr. Bossy: yeah, sure.

Me: Cookies. I was thinking about cookies.

Mr. Bossy: OK. What about cookies?

Me: I like 'em.

Yep. That was the extent of it. I think about cookies. Pretty regularly, if you must know.